On IFAKs and Paramedic Cosplay
You Are Not a Medic, Even If You Play One at TCCC Classes
A friend posted this list of prohibited items at the Coachella Music Festival:
He is understandably pissed that he can’t even bring a friggin’ tourniquet into the festival. The festival organizers would far rather you bleed to death waiting for one of their staff to get to you, apparently.
But some of the Paramedic Cosplayers out there are all, “But, muh decompression needle!” or “You can have my Turkel needle or McSwain dart after you pry it from my cold, dead hands…”
Look, Johnny Gage, I know you love training, and you love playing Door Kicker Cosplay at expensive range classes taught by [insert name of acclaimed Tier One Operator here] and you finally realized you can’t be all about Dat Life without carrying an IFK and getting some tactical medical training…
… but you ain’t a paramedic.
For that matter, even if you ARE a Door Kicker, if your job description does not include a handy wallet card that took 1-2 years to earn, you are stepping out on a very thin legal branch when you try to do paramedic stuff in real life.
Yeah, maybe you were a 68 Whiskey in the Army or a Navy Corpsman, but unless you are certified as a PARAMEDIC - not just an EMT - in civilian life, you’re gonna get your ass in a legal crack.
The legal term is practicing medicine without a license, and it will leave you seeking a rewarding career in the fast food service industry.
Hell, it’s not like needling a chest is an easy skill to master, either. Yeah, for someone well-versed in human anatomy who can find the relevant landmarks, who has practiced it on manikins, tissue models and cadavers, it’s not hard. It has a Pucker Factor of 8, Skill Factor of 2, but even seasoned medics put the needle in the wrong place in the heat of the moment.
The star represents the correct anterior needle decompression site. the various black dots are where paramedics in this study placed it instead. The bigger black dates represent multiple incorrect placements at that site.
So if there’s ANY question at all about what you can do as a layperson rescuer performing wound care, just remember this:
Putting stuff ON people (chest seals, tourniquets, pressure bandages) is just fine.
Putting stuff IN people (needle decompression, IVs,advanced airways) is the business of professional rescuers only.
For further reading, only if you’re a layperson and medical shit interests you:
I just want to know what terrible thing they think one can do with a compression bandage.
Then, on top of your points on The Judiciary, there is the outdate problem. Gotta buy replacements from time to time. While $30 a pop for a non expired tourniquet sort of burns, there is the happy feeling that I did NOT encounter such an enthusiastically bleeding wound, to consider.